A couple of Sundays ago while I was in Church, a lady went up to the steps going up to the altar and knelt down. This was during our Worship service, when church first started. As I sang and watched the lady, I assume she was praying, I had this nudge in my heart that I needed to go down there and pray for her. I asked myself, gosh Tiff really? The nudge did not go away. I decided that I would stay where I was and pray for her, besides going all the way down there. Still, the nudge did not go away until she stood up and went back to chair. As I stood there thinking to myself, gosh, what opportunity did I just miss? Did I have a chance to help her, or someone she knows by actually going DOWN there and putting my hand on her back and praying?
Another story, there is a gentleman that walks up and down Hwy 98 all the time. I see him just about every time I leave my house. At first he always had the same clothes on, carrying the same color plastic bag, with a big beard and hair that needed a trim. I told Evan, we really need to give him a backpack and maybe a shirt or something of yours you think might fit him. From a distance, and driving by he looks about(ish) Evan’s size. One day, he had a new shirt on, new pants, and had a clean face and trimmed hair. Still, I feel that I need to give him a backpack with some clothes or something inside. Evan has told me I think we need to give him my black jacket so he can be warm this winter. What could hurt from stopping, getting out of my car with the bag, and telling him what is in it, and that I feel the Lord wants you to have this and invite him to church with us? All the could say is no thanks and walk away. My husband has seen him walk away from a car that pulled over before, but you never know the intention of the person in that car. I’ve thought maybe if I start off with I feel the Lord, or the Lord has placed it on my heart, maybe he will be more receptive to stop?
This is something I struggle with a lot. Was that nudge that I felt in my heart from God telling me, Tiffany you need to go bless this lady and pray for her? Tiffany you need to give this man what I have instructed your husband and you to give? Or was it my own head telling me these things, and I’m going to go all the way down there to the lady or to this man and look like an idiot? I should not let FEAR keep me from listening to that voice. I heard a couple of months ago, that you never want to ignore that voice telling you to call a person. Since, I have heard that I have been faithful (80% of the time, as opposed to 50% before) in following through with that voice.
My main problem is FEAR & REJECTION! I feel that I am not worthy enough, or I do not know enough to go up to a stranger and give him something because I FEAR he will reject it or me. I know deep in my heart, my passion and purpose (somehow) is bring God’s glory to people worldwide. I know my passion and purpose is to go to other countries, spread God’s word and help them in some way, form, or fashion. If i am EVER going to be able to fulfill that purpose that has been placed within my heart, I need to Seek the Lord more earnestly, and put on them Big Girl Panties and DO what has been placed on my heart instead of chickening out.
So, as soon as I am done on here, I am going to grab that backpack, and place it by my front door. Then when my husband comes home, he can pick out an outfit or whatever he feels lead to give to this man, the jacket, and some food inside this backpack. Then we are going to PRAY for this man, and that God will guide us to him so we can give him this gift, and go find him. No more FEAR stopping this girl from fulfilling the calling that Lord has placed on my heart! You never know when the person you stop to help is actually going to bless you more than you bless them? Maybe that is why God has called you to this person?
Oh yes, another plus in my not letting Fear drag me down, is what an awesome way to physically teach Lily about Love and how we are to Love one another. How are to bless others and share God with them! She is so young but I need to start BEING THE EXAMPLE!!!!!!!!!!!