Roller Coaster week of Emotions

Last week, has been one of those weeks you feel like you have sunk in a hole and cannot find your way out. One of those weeks the enemy has been feeding you with lies, but not any lies the kind that speak right to your weak spot. So strong and so piercing you almost want to believe them. So close to the truth yet so far away from the truth you do not know which way is up. Yes one of those weeks. A “Roller coaster week of Emotions!”

It all started with the lie, you cannot home school your daughter you are to much of a procrastinator. It will never work because you lose your focus and you let weeks slip by before you realize. Now I would Love to home school my daughter and I cannot shake the tiny fire in my heart that says, she needs to stay be homeschooled just trust me. Hmmmm… those two Powerful words Trust Me! I am so torn, even thought she just turned 3 in September, as to if I am supposed to Home-school, find a way to send her to private school, or do public school. As this week has shown me I need to Fully submit to God and Fully ask His help in this area. I need to remember that I have God Fully on my side! He will give me the wisdom if I ask, all I got to do is TRUST HIM!

Another lie that, is you are not doing enough to please God. You are sleeping in when you should be getting up, you are not spending enough alone time with God, you are not doing enough to allow the Holy Spirit to work in you, yes those kinds of lie. Yes, I know they are all lies but it is true that, that is an area I struggle. I struggle with getting up enough time before Lily to really pray and read my bible. I struggle with spending ALONE time with the HIM! I struggle in every area of my Life but I need to STOP ask God for help. HE is the ONLY person who can Truly and Permanently help me in this area. I need to submit my Whole life to Him and not just bits and pieces.

The last issue is a super personal one, I had an emotional breakdown Saturday Night because of it. I try and I try to, I pray and I pray, over this issue but yet nothing changes, or it could be changing I’m just not seeing it. In fact it seems like my world is slipping away, in so many different directions, but yet I can do nothing about it. It seems like a bunch of “one way” streets now. I try to turn back but you cannot make U-Turns and everything I knew is gone away. But you can think of it like this, I DID pray for change! I DID pray for a “new beginning” (in a way). Maybe this is God’s way of saying something New is coming along, I know you cannot see it, just TRUST ME (there it is again) and you will see, IN MY TIME! Hmm Ouch! I think I’m Lost and there is nowhere to go right now, but I forget that I have the PERFECT person to turn to, GOD!

Praise the Lord my family is healthy, and rejoice because our Lord is King! The more I turn to Him Alone, the more of his truth and discernment he will give to me. I have to be patient because everything is in HIS timing!!!!!!!! I know new and good things are coming, I just gotta wait out this waiting period and never Forget who is Number 1 in my life! When God is working on us, or changing something about us or around us, it hurts. You might not be able to realize it at first but Do not Ever Forget that God works all things out for the Glory of Him!!


One thought on “Roller Coaster week of Emotions

  1. Tiffany, just remember this Bible verse: “I can do ALL thing through Him who gives me strength.” Don’t let the ney sayers pull you down. You CAN homeschool if your heart is in it. And I know it is. Who better to school your child….a total stranger? I think not. Every mother struggles,with those decisions whether they admit it or not. They struggle with the same things you are struggling with. Suzanna Wesley had 17 children. Do you know when and how she had her quiet time? She would sit in a special chair and pull her apron up over her head. The children were taught that, that was her special time with the Lord and they were not to disturb her when she did that. Did you get that she had 17 children!!

    Corrie Ten Boom was asked one time how she had her quiet time, and how often. She said I don’t set out snippets of time. When I write a letter, I pray that the Lord would help me write it. And He always did. Then when I sent it to post, I would pray that the person receiving the letter would be blessed by it. And they were. She said I pray over everything. This is my devotion to God. She said when I had extra time I would devote myself to hiding God’s word in my heart ….. because you never know when or where, the devil is going to attack. If I have verses in my heart… no one, especially the devil can steal it away from me. Find verses that speak to you and memorize them and you will be twice blessed. Once, when you memorize it and then, when the Holy Spirit brings it to your rememberance when you need it most. We fight fire with fire. The fire of the Holy Spirit is so powerful nothing can quech it. That’s a promise from scripture. I hope this helps. If you ever need to talk I’m a phone call away,

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